Why I Appreciate Arguments

Only a few people in my life have ever seen me angry.

I don’t enjoy the experience of arguments, and I don’t look for them. I am sometimes embarrassed by how I act.

However, when they happen, I appreciate them, because their resolution comes with immense learning and growth.

I appreciate the relationships I have where ending them as a result of an argument is not a real option on the table.

These relationships have catalyzed my growth more than almost anything else in my life.

Sometimes arguments expose us to a blind spot that we must take ownership over. Other times, they help us understand another person more deeply than ever before. They can be the kick in the butt to change something that should have been changed before. Or they can remind us how to forgive and how to be humble. Finally, sometimes they’re a simple reminder that we need to reduce the amount of stress in our life and increase the amount of sleep.

I am grateful for my 13-year relationship with the love of my life, Sheena Lindahl. We met during Freshman orientation at NYU. We have had our arguments over the years, but we’ve always grown closer as a result of them. We’ve always been able to find that common ground, forgive each other, and start over.